Simply Frustrated

Have you ever just wanted to drop everything and give up?  Well I am about there today. We currently rent our homestead and after moving 2 hours away from everyone to start fresh and get away from a really crappy rental and landlord who doesn't give a horses butt I am there again. I just keep shaking my head wondering what next, I spent $10,000 total between first and last and moving expenses....yep goodbye down deposit for a home. Now I am sitting here trying to figure out what I can do to make some extra cash. I love baking but because I rent my home I cannot sell baked goods, also I don't have a second kitchen. I continue to write my cookbook but know that won't bring in much at all. Between teaching my children, doing chores and baking, I am pretty much beat by 7pm.  I just don't know what to do anymore but I hate living in a home where the landlord has no care and instead of checking things out, just calls and says oh in the spring. Well I have a roof that leaks, walls that leak, windows that leak and have mold, walls that are getting mold spots and a hose that pours water into my crawlspace...I am simply frustrated.
If only I had purchased property a few years back, but no I decided to wait and now I have been told I need a co-signer or 20% down....for a large family on a fixed income this is almost impossible. I love homesteading and living a more self-sufficient life but at the same time I fear I will have to give it all up just because I want a decent home to raise my children in. I feel like crying sometimes because I get so upset, but have to hold it back for my children's sake. So until I can figure out a way to get ourselves a homestead where we can raise our animals and have the acreage we need, I am going to plant my garden, try and sell some of my vegetables and hope I find that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. It just goes to show you can never judge a book by its cover.